September 13, 2006

• China Blog: Day 18
  

  16:16 Beijing Time
  

  
  

  Phrase Of The Day: Wo mei zui zai…. (I’m never drinking again….)

  Okay, after a morning of volatile stomach-upsettery and a lecture on
  the Dark Ages, I’m finally feeling fit enough to write a full-scale
  Blog. Apparently last night’s hi-jinks were very amusing for all
  involved, and I must confess I had a wonderful time. I just don’t think
  I’ll be consuming that much alcohol  in such a short space of time
  ever again. The Korean food was fantastic, but I think tonight is going
  to be an evening of sitting in, cleaning the flat, watching DVD’s,
  eating safe, non-flammatory foodstuffs and drinking water.

  Yesterday was great fun. Me and Dennis went to check out Guilin Lu,
  which is basically one of the main shopping areas in the city. It’s a
  crazy amalgamation of chain stores and street vendors, and I’m pretty
  sure if you looked long enough you could find most things there. It’s
  also a lot easier to get to than I imagined so I should be able to get
  there on my own fairly easily, and maybe NOT end up in Beijing. Dennis
  introduced me to “rolling lunch”- a hodgepodge of food bought from a
  variety of vendors, which was certainly both a pleasant experience and
  a suspected cause of this morning’s unpleasantness.

  After that we swung by “Beard Papa”, a sort of patisserie-esque
  establishment highly recommended by Fiona, where I acquired the cream
  puff to end all cream puffs. You know the custard you find inside a
  Boston Cream doughnut? Imagine a tennis-ball-sized lump of that encased
  in the flimsiest of pastry shells. It’s physically impossible to eat
  without ending up looking like a victim of Crinkley Bottom’s gunge
  tank, and it tastes like…well. Let’s just say I could easily get
  addicted. Fiona scores once again!

  Then I went and picked up afore-mentioned DVD’s. Ripped off, naturally.
  Not that I advocate video piracy, but here in the PRC it’s almost
  IMPOSSIBLE to get genuine….uh….well, anything. Brands mean little
  here, because people automatically assume it’s ripped off. So now I
  have some English-language films aside from Jurassic Parks 2 & 3.

  Also, yesterday, I bit the bullet and did that most terrifying of
  things todo in a foreign country: I got a haircut. Dennis wrote down
  what I wanted, and off I ventured to the barbers…

  Now, my fear of hairdressers is always a big deal. Even when I worked
  in the States, or Sunderland,  I felt uncomfortable around the
  barbers there. No idea why, I just have a fear that they’ll mess up my
  hair so catastrophically I have to shave all my mop off and lose my
  coveted title of “Lewis Male With The Most Hair”. or that I’ll be the
  victim of some Sweeney Todd-like serial killer. And I mean this- i
  think it may actually be some kind of phobia. Not being at my regular
  barbers terrifies me.  So imagine if you can, a  nervous
  Englishman asking for a haircut  using very bad Chinese, a scrap
  of paper, and his ever-present BBC phrasebook,  and you begin to
  see  my predicament.

  So how did it go?

  Well, it went well! The guy seemed to understand my Mandarin babblings,
  and the haircut isn’t in any way disastrous! And the head massage
  before and after was very welcome!

  Phew.

  The rest of the afternoon was spent playing footy and just generally
  working up a sweat before the evening meal, which was great fun, from
  what I can remember….

  ….All of which brings us to this morning, and my slow recovery. My
  lecture today was great, even though I set my class a surprise test
  that scared the bejesus out of them.One of my favourite periods of
  British history too….the Dark Ages.  God, I’m such a history
  geek at times it shocks me.

  Anyways, that’s life! However, I did work out that Guardian.co.uk isn’t
  actually blocked by the Great Firewall Of China! Objective left-wing
  news! YAY!!!!!!!!

  Oh, and the ever-wonderful Tom Conneeley sent me this little gem: Enjoy!
  http://www.b3ta.com/links/One_day_at_Torchwood

  Zai Jian!

  • 4:47 am
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